Post by Damien Samsoknight on Apr 18, 2009 15:21:24 GMT -5
*It is the Friday before Last Man Standing, and Ralph Nader has been going to select states in the U.S. to campaign for his big match this Sunday. In chronological order: Monday: Georgia, Tuesday: New York, Wednesday: Ohio, Thursday: Home state of Washington D.C., Today: Final campaign , Colorado. Previously we found Nader in Washington D.C. in front a crowd of thousands of fans. Although drunk during his speech , they knew he meant business, and that his main goal was too ensure that Israel Adams did not win this Sunday and that he would leave the ring in a stretcher*
*The scene opens with a view of the Jesus Christ Church of Ladder Day Saints in Colorado, where Nader’s final campaign speech is about to go underway. We find a expensive mahogany wood podium set up in front of the large doors of the church where Nader will give his speech. There is a large crowd of an estimated 2000 people awaiting the arrival of the “Longshaft“. Nader remains behind the large closed doors of the church awaiting to go outside and address the people. He finds himself in need of a word of prayer before making his speech. *
Ralph: *sitting on a long pew in the church with head bowed and hands held together* Dear heavenly father, give me the strength to show those people out there how long my shaft……….Wait sorry lord.. Give me the strength to tell the people out there what the Longshaft is all about. I am a changed man. Give me liberty or give me death! Amen…
*Ralph bursts out of the doors and hold both hands up and makes a peace sign in each hand. The crowd goes wild and is confused to why he is making peace signs. Blinded by their enthusiasm they continue to go wild*
*Ralph standing over the podium made of mahogany*
Ralph: Thank you! Thank you! Thank you everyone *crowd stops cheering completely*.. Thank you!! No thank you! Oh my, thank you! It is so good to be here people of Colorado. Before I go any further I must make a public apology to you all. This past Wednesday in Washington D.C. , I was not myself, and I deeply apologize to all the people I may have scared or offended anyone watching from the crowd or on the television *the crowd feels appreciative for his apology*. Truly I am. But I also said a few things about a certain wrestler. You all know him of course as Israel Adams. Let me point out that first off, I think Israel is a great wrestl………*Begins to cough as if choking*….*Stops coughing*….I am sorry, but as Abraham Lincoln said “I cannot tell a lie” and I am not about to start. I meant every single thing I said about Israel Adams, I may have been hammered out of my mind, But weather I am drunk or sober, I know he is the worst excuse for a wrestler I have ever seen! *The crowd has a mixed reaction, the reaction mixed with boo chants and loud cheers of enjoyment*…. That’s right, you all agree with me as well. This man has angered me in so many ways. If it weren’t for him I’d already have my title shot and wouldn’t have to waste my Damn time with this match. I’d be fighting the champion this Sunday. I was robbed I tell you. *looks at camera*. But I am a changed man America.
*More of the crowd is siding with Nader and more begin cheering for him*
Ralph: I know now what I have to do. This is no longer about getting the belt anymore Israel Adams, you have made it personal. When you try to embarrass me and make fun of my love for America, and you say you I don’t take ICW seriously, you have a crossed the line Crackpot! *a vein begins to show on his forhead*
*Nader drinks some water to cool himself off, he is flourished with anger*
Ralph: I have now come upon a decision. This Sunday it is my mission to ensure Israel Adams does not walk out of the ring conscious. If I cannot do this, Israel Adam’s statements will become true. At this point America, I know I may not win the match overall this Sunday, that’s okay I have accepted that… That doesn’t mean I can’t take out my number one enemy. So let it be know through out the land *puts hand on his chest as if about to quote the pledge*, I do so solemnly swear that if I and only I ,Ralph Nader, cannot manage to eliminate Israel Adams in any way shape or form, Then I Ralph Nader shall forever resign from ICW. *the crowd boos loudly as Ralph has a frown upon his face*
*ICW official walks from behind Ralph and hands him the contract to sign this agreement. The contract reads:
“If the selected wrestler cannot manage to pin the selected wrestler of his choosing in any way shape or form, the wrestler must be fired immediately. And the wrestler is not obligated to win the match all together, his only objective is to defeat the selected wrestler of his choosing.”
*Ralph signs his signature to the paper and hands it back to the ICW official*
ICW official: I will make sure Byson sees this right away *walks off into the woods*.
*Ralph puzzled to why going through the woods is easier than taking a cab*
*Ralph turns back to crowd and has a dark and determined look on his face*
Ralph: I warn everyone of you, this Sunday, to please not bring your children, for I do not want them to see the terrible things I am going to do to Israel Adams. This Sunday, my fists will stain with the blood of Israel Adams. I will have my revenge! Furthermore, you will remember this match as the match where Israel Adams finally gave into the white man. This will be the match where the slave will beg for undeserved mercy from his owner the Longshaft!………..*Crowd is cheering horrendously*….For you Israel Adams…………..THERE IS NO WAY OUT!
*the crowd cheers loudly for Ralph as walks away. Nader gets into his car and begins to drive away. The crowd watches as he drives back to Washington D.C. All of a sudden, while taking a left at the near four way stop, Ralph forgets to turn his turn signal on. A semi- truck is going in the same direction as him, foreshadowing a car accident between the two automobiles. The semi is about to hit Nader’s car and potentially threatening Nader’s life. Thinking rationally, Nader trys to dodge. Nader zooms past the truck. Believing he had completely dodged the truck, unaware, the truck his the back of his car, Hydroplaning Ralph Nader and his car straight into the thick woods next to the highway.*
*Hours have passed and the police are observing the accident location. They have been looking for Ralph’s car for quite some time. Out of the blue one police shouts…*
Police officer: Look I think I found something! Fellows come here quick!
*The officer finds Nader’s car battered and destroyed in a ditch deep in the woods, he calls the rest of his squad over to help him search the car. For half an hour they search in an around the car for Ralph Nader’s body., but to no success, it is as if Ralph just disappeared, Assumed to be dead, the cops give up and leave the scene. As they leave, one officer looks behind at the car once more and begins to speak*
Officer: I just don’t believe he is really gone….
*The scene opens with a view of the Jesus Christ Church of Ladder Day Saints in Colorado, where Nader’s final campaign speech is about to go underway. We find a expensive mahogany wood podium set up in front of the large doors of the church where Nader will give his speech. There is a large crowd of an estimated 2000 people awaiting the arrival of the “Longshaft“. Nader remains behind the large closed doors of the church awaiting to go outside and address the people. He finds himself in need of a word of prayer before making his speech. *
Ralph: *sitting on a long pew in the church with head bowed and hands held together* Dear heavenly father, give me the strength to show those people out there how long my shaft……….Wait sorry lord.. Give me the strength to tell the people out there what the Longshaft is all about. I am a changed man. Give me liberty or give me death! Amen…
*Ralph bursts out of the doors and hold both hands up and makes a peace sign in each hand. The crowd goes wild and is confused to why he is making peace signs. Blinded by their enthusiasm they continue to go wild*
*Ralph standing over the podium made of mahogany*
Ralph: Thank you! Thank you! Thank you everyone *crowd stops cheering completely*.. Thank you!! No thank you! Oh my, thank you! It is so good to be here people of Colorado. Before I go any further I must make a public apology to you all. This past Wednesday in Washington D.C. , I was not myself, and I deeply apologize to all the people I may have scared or offended anyone watching from the crowd or on the television *the crowd feels appreciative for his apology*. Truly I am. But I also said a few things about a certain wrestler. You all know him of course as Israel Adams. Let me point out that first off, I think Israel is a great wrestl………*Begins to cough as if choking*….*Stops coughing*….I am sorry, but as Abraham Lincoln said “I cannot tell a lie” and I am not about to start. I meant every single thing I said about Israel Adams, I may have been hammered out of my mind, But weather I am drunk or sober, I know he is the worst excuse for a wrestler I have ever seen! *The crowd has a mixed reaction, the reaction mixed with boo chants and loud cheers of enjoyment*…. That’s right, you all agree with me as well. This man has angered me in so many ways. If it weren’t for him I’d already have my title shot and wouldn’t have to waste my Damn time with this match. I’d be fighting the champion this Sunday. I was robbed I tell you. *looks at camera*. But I am a changed man America.
*More of the crowd is siding with Nader and more begin cheering for him*
Ralph: I know now what I have to do. This is no longer about getting the belt anymore Israel Adams, you have made it personal. When you try to embarrass me and make fun of my love for America, and you say you I don’t take ICW seriously, you have a crossed the line Crackpot! *a vein begins to show on his forhead*
*Nader drinks some water to cool himself off, he is flourished with anger*
Ralph: I have now come upon a decision. This Sunday it is my mission to ensure Israel Adams does not walk out of the ring conscious. If I cannot do this, Israel Adam’s statements will become true. At this point America, I know I may not win the match overall this Sunday, that’s okay I have accepted that… That doesn’t mean I can’t take out my number one enemy. So let it be know through out the land *puts hand on his chest as if about to quote the pledge*, I do so solemnly swear that if I and only I ,Ralph Nader, cannot manage to eliminate Israel Adams in any way shape or form, Then I Ralph Nader shall forever resign from ICW. *the crowd boos loudly as Ralph has a frown upon his face*
*ICW official walks from behind Ralph and hands him the contract to sign this agreement. The contract reads:
“If the selected wrestler cannot manage to pin the selected wrestler of his choosing in any way shape or form, the wrestler must be fired immediately. And the wrestler is not obligated to win the match all together, his only objective is to defeat the selected wrestler of his choosing.”
*Ralph signs his signature to the paper and hands it back to the ICW official*
ICW official: I will make sure Byson sees this right away *walks off into the woods*.
*Ralph puzzled to why going through the woods is easier than taking a cab*
*Ralph turns back to crowd and has a dark and determined look on his face*
Ralph: I warn everyone of you, this Sunday, to please not bring your children, for I do not want them to see the terrible things I am going to do to Israel Adams. This Sunday, my fists will stain with the blood of Israel Adams. I will have my revenge! Furthermore, you will remember this match as the match where Israel Adams finally gave into the white man. This will be the match where the slave will beg for undeserved mercy from his owner the Longshaft!………..*Crowd is cheering horrendously*….For you Israel Adams…………..THERE IS NO WAY OUT!
*the crowd cheers loudly for Ralph as walks away. Nader gets into his car and begins to drive away. The crowd watches as he drives back to Washington D.C. All of a sudden, while taking a left at the near four way stop, Ralph forgets to turn his turn signal on. A semi- truck is going in the same direction as him, foreshadowing a car accident between the two automobiles. The semi is about to hit Nader’s car and potentially threatening Nader’s life. Thinking rationally, Nader trys to dodge. Nader zooms past the truck. Believing he had completely dodged the truck, unaware, the truck his the back of his car, Hydroplaning Ralph Nader and his car straight into the thick woods next to the highway.*
*Hours have passed and the police are observing the accident location. They have been looking for Ralph’s car for quite some time. Out of the blue one police shouts…*
Police officer: Look I think I found something! Fellows come here quick!
*The officer finds Nader’s car battered and destroyed in a ditch deep in the woods, he calls the rest of his squad over to help him search the car. For half an hour they search in an around the car for Ralph Nader’s body., but to no success, it is as if Ralph just disappeared, Assumed to be dead, the cops give up and leave the scene. As they leave, one officer looks behind at the car once more and begins to speak*
Officer: I just don’t believe he is really gone….